Tales of a wandering lesbian

The eternal return

I’m back. It’s the third time in about a year that I’m in Italy. This time, I’m here with my aunt. It’s a scouting mission of types. She’ll be retiring in a little over a year, and we’re looking for a place in the south of Italy for her. I’m basically tagging along, soaking up every ounce of life I can.

The run-up to this trip was unlike the last two. There was no job to quit, no house to sell, no major life change. Just a packing-up and coming back. So I was able to spend the week before the trip enjoying the people and places I love. It was beautiful. I found myself, on several occasions, welling up with emotion at the incredible beauty of my life. Sitting in a coffee shop, eating pie, riding my bike, hiking in the woods, I’d be overwhelmed at how fantastic, how downright fun life is. In one year, it has changed completely for me, and I am grateful. In every moment, I am grateful – okay, maybe not every moment, but a lot of the time.

I have amazing friends. Generous, kind, peaceful people who have housed me, fed me, supported me and above all loved me. People who have given me the luxury to live my life as I see fit. To experience this leap fully.

Sometimes, people tell me how lucky I am. I don’t see it as luck. I am a fortunate woman to be able to make the choices I have. That is for sure. I am blessed beyond measure. By my family and friends. By the grace that has given me health and perspective and opportunity. I am blessed.

And I am grateful to have pushed aside the veil that kept me in doubt and less than full appreciation for this amazing life. I am truly grateful for the glimpses I have into the limitless possibility of my existence. I am grateful that I remember to choose my path in that existence. I am grateful for the choices I have made and the ones I will make.

We are in Rome today – the eternal city – on our way south. Already, after two trips, it feels like a piece of home. A reminder of what can come from living fully, with intention. And I am eternally grateful.

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June 1, 2010   Comments Off on The eternal return